Those of use lucky enough to go the Satellite 2017 conference in Washington DC in March were treated to a day of beautiful summer weather, well – until the cold blew in. Still, there were some surprises to be had on that delightful day during a walk around the city. And the town definitely had a “red feel” about it.
Your correspondent’s passage to the Lincoln memorial and Washington Monument was interrupted by President Trump’s limo motorcade, along with its essential siren-blaring police motorcycle outriders rushing him to the White House. Or at least your correspondent thinks it was him who was on board. When he asked a “secret service” policeman, he was told it was “Justin Bieber”.
Well he can just go and fly a kite! Just like what was happening at the rocket-like Washington monument, with one alien-looking red one looking particularly menacing.
There have been a few changes since this writer was last in this town. All the Washington taxis from whatever cab company they are from, now have an Uber-defeating red and silver scheme which is very much in the style of “Starsky and Hutch” (for those old enough to remember this 1970s Detective TV series). It is thus very strange to see one of these red and silver taxi’s with “Yellow Cab Company” written on its side.
On that note, your correspondent also met a friendly US space insurance broker called Bob (“Bob the Broker”), who looked uncannily like the actor Paul Michael Glaser who played “Detective Starsky” in that seminal series.
There must be something in the water out there.
The red theme continued as Washington DC is, of course, known for its currently underperforming “Washington Redskins” American football team. It is named after “Red Indians” (more politely known as native Americans) who were somewhat unfairly evicted from some of their lands by white settlers during the 18th and 19th centuries (albeit with reservations provided in lieu). Nevertheless, this writer was surprised to have met a load real ones camped out in their Tipis or are they wigwams?) next to the Washington Monument. Was this one of their reservations?
No. Actually the members of several tribes were present to protest against President Donald Trump and the planned redirection of an allegedly polluting pipeline across Sioux tribe land. An insightful Navajo Indian called Thunder Voice Eagle (beats being called Donald any day) eloquently explained that President Trump, who apparently often speaks with a forked tongue, is in favour of the pipeline because he (allegedly) has a financial interest in it.
Mind you, angry as this Navajo warrior was, he remained peaceful. Unlike the old Western movies, this “injun” did not look like he wanted to scalp Donald Trump – no doubt because Donald’s mane looks too dodgy.
Still, as your correspondent awaited his flight in Washington’s Dulles airport at the end of his trip, his mind again turned to Donald Trump as his lucky Republican/Feng Shui red tie. As he did so he found a stall selling fridge magnets with Donald Trump’s picture on the front of it.
He decided to get one as gift for the friends who previously gave him a fridge magnet from their trip to Italy. The one gave to your correspondent had a model of Michelangelo’s statue of David’s penis on it with your correspondent’s first name “David” written above it. What were they trying to say?
Thus, this new Donald Trump fridge magnet was a retaliatory gift. An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, and a Donald one for a David one you could say.
On that note, your correspondent signs off now with is new preferred Indian name: Tinkling Voice Sparrow. Or would a Red Kite bird be better?